Starbucks New Drink of the Week

I finally tried it...a green tea frapp. OH MY GOODNESS. I have never had green tea anything. And I am not sure what real green tea tastes like or if this is it or what. But try one, it is so gooooooooooooooooooooooood, I added a scoop of vanilla bean to mine, because I LOVE vanilla bean. But I have had without and it is just as good.
You will not be disappointed, and though the green tea part sounds healthy it does come topped with whipped cream, which I make like 10 at a time and I guarantee you there is not one healthy thing about that stuff!
Remember if you don't like it, we will make you something else. So try it, try it, try it....a Green Tea Frapp WITH WHIP!

The World of Medication

WARNING - This is a vent: you may agree/disagree. Not looking for feedback, just a place to post my thoughts.

If someone is ill, within certain guidelines, medication is prescribed, sometimes short term, say a 10 day antibiotic. If the illness is more chronic or long term, i.e. blood pressure, diabetes etc. it could be life long. What about mental illness -there is a little bit of both, right?

Now think of all those commercials you see for medication, which might I add, the US is one of two countries that can advertise medication on television. You know the voice that tells you about the 1002 side effects you may get if you take THIS medication? Hmmm, makes you wonder why you would want to try.
But you and your condition go to the Dr. and the Dr. says try THIS and you do and you get 2 of the 1000 side effect. Not bad odds, except instead of the lack of appetite and shortness of breath, you gained 45pounds and now have a rapid heartbeat.
BUUUUUTTTT you feel better say "mentally" then you have ever felt before.
So, you weigh the pros and cons and say okay, I'll be stable and functional but fat and take another med to counter act the heartbeat.

Its frustrating. Its frustrating for ME. Because this is ME. I have been wrangling with different medications to control my anxiety, depression and borderline since late JAN. We thought we had the right combo - it only caused 20lb weight gain and headaches which we counteracted with just 1 drug. Then in mid Sept. I had another "episode", the drugs were changed....another 20lbs, extreme fatigue/sleepiness and the depression got worse. And every drug you try, or increase or decrease it takes around 5 weeks to see the results, just a glimpse of "if this is a fix". The waiting is excruciating on everyone around.

What happens when they think the 500mg dose is now a good one and you send off for your 3month mail order and get the bill for over $300! Okay, I was already depressed, I know this is the drug that makes me fat and now its making me poor. Tell me how this is going to make me better?
One week after getting this filled we go back to the Dr. tell her about the extreme weight gain, extreme price (extreme cost b/c we have to get new clothes too), I am so tired....people saying hopefully she'll take you off of it. NO WAY I have $300 worth of it in my cabinet. Thankfully we just reduce the dose in hopes that it works but the weight drops etc. etc.
The generic $3 a month anti -dep isn't working, lets try a BRAND NEW drug, no generic of course. $22 a month. Seriously - this medication thing and anxiety/depression don't really work well together if you are purchasing it yourself. Every penny or hundred of dollars you spend make you feel mad, sad, and frankly - worse! about the whole situation. So, from now on I think Jake is responsible for my meds. AND I will not weigh myself. I will do what I can to be healthy but I can not control what "x" drug is doing to me, other then it is working and I have to accept that I need it and weight is weight. Its better to be overweight and alive and part of life then skinny and depressed, right? Remind me of that as I purchase new 2 sizes bigger, with money I don't have, jeans.

That's my rant and rave - you need this for this, and then this drug to offset the effect of this drug and all the while its dollars here and dollars there. What if I just stopped it all? Would I REALLY GO REALLY CRAZY? I would have a heck of a lot more money per month, I'll tell ya that!

Flat Out, No Fun and Straight Up Addicted

We'll start with the flat out and no fun - Jake. Yes, this is where you keep saying, "but college was free, but college was free!"....as he moans and groans, and finally WALKS after a week. His back is injured again - bulging disks, his spondi?? Not sure. What I am sure of, is coming home from work to find him FLAT on his back, unable to move and he stayed that way for over 48 hours. It took his mom, dad, myself and a beach towel to roll him from side to side. Yeah, no fun. We have muscle relaxers, pain killers, portable ice and stem and so there is enough movement he can make it to work, or at least is on his 3rd "attempt" today.
In the mean time we are trying to get in with a Dr. here, who works/worked with TU athletes. But they won't see him until they see his OP report from our Dr. in Idaho. So, this means leaving a message with a machine regarding the URGENCY of some records that are 4 yrs old. Meanwhile, I watch the love of my life walk crooked, oooh and aghh at every movement. Get frustrated getting dressed, getting up and down - EVERYTHING hurts. FYI - he is a big guy, not so easy for me to move around/help. Volunteers?

So the addicted part - we already knew I was a starbucks junkie. Let me tell you, being an employee has done NOTHING to curb this habit but spurred it further, probably into the addiction category. People I have Starbucks at my disposal for FREE. Yes, all the mochas, lattes, frapps, drip coffee, whatever I want, whenever I want. On the job, off the job, take one home after the job, drink one before the job.
Oh and beans! I get a pound of beans a week for free! I am certainly not drinking it at home since I can drink it there, so I have coffee dripping out of my pores!
Oh and for those of you that thought the Peppermint Mocha was just for Christmas - here ya go, the big secret - it is a REGULAR MENU ITEM!!!!
Order up! The best part is putting a little of this and a little of that together and making my own concoctions which I could then order from my friends at the drive thru window just to make them punch in a million codes, but I haven't gotten that gutsy. I love love love my job. The people are amazing, the benefits are great.
I work nights and weekends and I drink on the job and then take something home, put it in the fridge for the next morning - tastes oh so yummy. Then on the in between days I just go in, they say what do you want, I say " so and so" it totals $4.71 or so and then they punch my number and I give them ZERO dollars.
A dream come true.

FIFTY POUNDS LATER........


Here is my latest concoction, in case you want to throw your barista for a wild one.

You order Grande, but tell them it will have to go in a venti cup......
Java Chip Frapp, add 2 scoops vanilla bean, add 2 shots espresso, skip the whip, 1 pump peppermint.

HEAVEN.

And by the way those that order LIGHT Frapps - it really is just a marketing thing. It is barely lighter. It is just the base that is light, and it is lighter in sugar and calories. Everything else is all the same.
Hate to burst your bubble.

Pray for Jake, for us to find a dr.
Thanksgiving for my job.


Top Ten

1. God's ironic (or is it really) timing of the Jake and Anthony's back stuff - thank you to the Ratica's for their help. Check out their blog Rat Talz. Anthony was Jake's teammate and sr. year roommate

2. Travis' willingness to make home calls, give out home ice and stem machines. I don't think Jake would be up without it.

3. Word of 3, yes 3 more WONDERFULLY close friends of mine announcing pregnancies.
That makes 11 total that I know and 5 that I would call BFF's

4. Getting Arbonne into Sarah F.'s hands, dying to hear what she thinks

5. Starting to go down on one of my meds that has caused me to gain a significant amount of weight, hoping the downward dosage = downward weight

6. My job - came at the right time, so many reasons it needed to happen and really it does not feel like a job at all. God bless starbucks

7. Technology - last night my mom (in AZ), my brother (deployed 6k miles away) and myself (in OK) were talking outloud via computer, and had webcams. All really for free. Too amazing.

8. Annie - too much to put

9. Jake for his open heart, mind and his ability to be there for me in ways no one else can or is willing

10. Rain

I Know You're There

I am so addicted to my Ipod. I love it. And I have been using it again as I go to sleep. One of my most comforting songs is I Know You're There by Casting Crowns. I found this blurb on their website:

What a moment, when we realize that God is not a book, and we can have a relationship with Him. I believe he captured that moment in this song.
~Psalm 139 / 2 Corinthians 4:16-18 / Deuteronomy 31:6 / Hebrews 13:5-6 / John 10:27-30 / 1 John 5:14-15 / 2 Samuel 22:7 / Psalm 91 / 1 Peter 3:12 / John 9:31

Written by Jeff Chandler

© 2006 Spin 360 Music (BMI) (admin. by Music Services)
Remember to Silence MY PLAYER at the bottom right, by hitting pause, before playing this.



Lyrics:

If all I had was one last breath
I’d spend it just to sing Your praise
Just to say Your name
If all I had was one last prayer
I’d pray it ‘cause I know You’re always listening
If I could live a thousand lives, bind the hands of time
I would spend every moment by Your side

‘Cause I, I know You’re there, I know You see me
You’re the air I breathe
You are the ground beneath me
I know You’re there, I know You hear me
I can find You anywhere

If all I had was one more song to sing
I would raise my voice to make the heavens ring
If all I had was one last chance, I’d take it
I would stake it all on You

If I could raise up high and catch a glimpse of every eye
I would make them believe
What I feel inside

If I could live a thousand lives and bind the hands of time
If I could rise up high and catch a glimpse of every eye

I know You’re there
I know You’re there
I know You’re there, You’re there

Instructions

OOPS. Okay to listen to the song below without hearing my player....
scroll down and hit pause on my music player, then hit play on the Josh Wilson song...and you can hear it by itself, sorry about that!!!
K

My Favorite Song

A BIG HUGE THANK YOU

To............Heather!!!
I want to publicly say thank you to Heather for making my page look so pretty. I wish I could take credit, but I can't. She customized it just for me, isn't it RAD?!
Thanks sweet friend!

Pictures....yes, I know it is October

I was doing so good! Back on track. Perhaps the pictures will make up for my lack of writing!


Reading is Hard Work!


Riding the Motorcycle with Daddad


Got my helmet